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Archive for February, 2010

I’m at the point now where I’m considering setting up a separate blog or a Tumblr or something for this shit.

Wednesday, February 24th, 2010

Kotaku just posted this item on their website:

It had to happen eventually. Having wowed people ceaselessly since E3 with a a succession of explosive trailers, Just Cause 2 has finally put a foot wrong. And as far as the PC crowd is concerned, it’s a big foot.

It’s been revealed that the game won’t run on Windows XP. Why? Because it’s DirectX10 only. So only those running Vista or Windows 7 will be able to play the game, making it the first high profile release to completely lock out the nine year-old operating system.

Are you kidding me? No, I’m not pissed off that Just Cause 2 is going to require DirectX 10, which means it won’t support Windows XP – I don’t give a mouse’s scrote about that. I’m pissed off because apparently it’s the “the first high profile release to completely lock out [Windows XP]“. Did Kotaku just forget about the Windows version of Halo 2? Y’know, the one that only works with Windows Vista, a fact that Kotaku themselves reported not once but twice in 2006?

Well done, Kotaku. Way to do your research.

And now a word from our sponsors…

Sunday, February 21st, 2010

(Click to embiggen)

This is exactly why advertisers should stick to the space they’ve paid for. I hate web-ads that “unfurl” in this manner. It’s intrusive and irritating.

Why is Videogame Journalism full of Morons?

Thursday, February 18th, 2010

Videogame journalism has been in a decline for the last two decades now. In the early 90s magazines were giving average games a 7 out of 10 score instead of the more obvious 5, purely to appease developers and publishers, and to ensure they continued to get review copies of the latest games. Incredulous and deceitful, but at least it served a purpose.

Now, in the 21st century, we’re getting all kinds of articles popping up on gaming blogs that, in all honestly, really shouldn’t be there.

When Juno came out in 2007, a rep at Fox came out in early 2008 and said something to the effect of her job being finding ways of expanding brands, for example by developing videogames based upon them, and she cited Juno as an example of a successful film that could go down that path. Every gaming blog I subscribed to lept upon this as clear evidence that a Juno videogame was in the works! Perhaps the worst offender out there was Gawker-owned gaming blog Kotaku, who a few days later posted an article stating the bloody obvious – the game wasn’t really under development, and an innocent comment had been taken out of context.

Don’t go looking for the article where Kotaku excitedly and terrifyingly reveal that Juno: The Game is under development. You won’t find it – they’ve long since deleted it. However a quick Google for “juno video game” reveals that there are plenty of articles on the subject written by other gaming blogs and news sites just as trigger-happy as, but perhaps a little more honest than, Kotaku are.

This morning Kotaku are once again guilty of getting all in a panic over something stupid. A recent post on the gaming blog put forth the question: With Halo Reach coming out this year and the game planning to offer a new multiplayer experience, will the Halo 3 servers be shutting down? The conclusion that they came to: No. Of course the answer is no. That’s not a question that requires you to get any clock cycles going in the brain. But for some reason the writer felt it necessary to contact someone at Bungie to find out.

That may be the single most retarded question I’ve ever seen posed on a gaming website. Halo is a huge franchise. There are people who are still playing the first one, for Glod’s sake. The Halo 2 servers are due to be closed this month but only because Xbox Live support for original Xbox games is being shut down. Hell, even smaller franchises like Worms have kept their servers up and running for older titles – the Worms 2 server has been going since 1997 and it’s still up and running, as are all the servers for every Worms game released since. Asking if the servers for an insanely popular game are going to be shut down two and a half years after the game was first released (and six months after a standalone expansion for the game was released) just because a new entry in the series is coming out is bloody stupid, and I can’t help but wonder exactly what was going through the mind of Brian Crecente, the writer of the entry, when he felt the need to not only pose the question but to research something with such a mind-meltingly obvious answer.

(It should be pointed out that Gawker Media’s blogs aren’t exactly beacons of fact. Last year io9 reported that Neil Gaiman was definitely writing an episode of Doctor Who for the show’s fifth series, and what’s more they knew the title and plot as well. That entry can be found here, although they removed the reference to the title and story in the wake of the denial Neil Gaiman issued shortly after io9 posted the news.)

Why is videogame journalism in such a turgid state? Why are the so-called journalists who write about the industry wasting so much time and energy asking questions that don’t need to be asked, and reporting news that isn’t really news? One could argue that this is the state of journalism as a whole, but I don’t think that’s the answer. Despite how seriously magazines like EDGE and websites like GamesIndustry.biz try to make themselves appear to be, the truth is that videogame journalism never broke out of its infancy. It’s filled with people writing what they think they know instead of actually doing the research. It’s filled with people raising concerns and asking questions about things that everybody already knows the answers to. It’s filled with people getting excited about a game one moment and then forgetting about it in the next. Gaming journalism has a lot of things, but an interest in games and a passion for the medium isn’t one of them.

And that’s a real shame.

“Let us know if you *knuckle-crack* change your mind.”

Tuesday, February 16th, 2010

I’ve let my McAfee antivirus account lapse, mostly because I don’t really like the idea of paying an annual subscription fee for a piece of software that they also release a new version of every year, meaning if I want to keep my antivirus software 100% current I basically have to pay for it twice. That’s a bit shit, but it’s the type of shit that McAfee can get away with. Apparently McAfee is one of those companies that tries to lure you back by making you shit your pants rather than by throwing the usual insincere “We’re sorry you’re leaving” messages at you.

Here’s an excerpt the latest of five emails I’ve received since Friday:

Internet thugs are motivated, ruthless…and silent. They use stealth to invade your computer system. It can happen so quickly, you won’t even realize it—at least not until after your credit score plunges.

They slip in the night, clad in black. They creep into your megabits and datapixels, surreptitiously pilfering every jiggawatt you have into their infosacks. And before you know it , BAM! You’re laying out on a table in Mexico’s Canadian district with some half-drunk, half-mad bandit sucking gin from your belly button while his associates steal your kidneys. All because you didn’t resubscribe to McAfee’s antivirus. Is that what you want? Is that the future you want for you and your family?

Membership starts from $49.99 a year.

Incompetent Love

Tuesday, February 9th, 2010

I started the year by re-reading Rob Grant’s “Incompetence” which, as a side-project, I’m adapting into a screenplay. I’ve already started typing up the dialogue for individual scenes but I’ve yet to sew anything together. I’m also trying to work out how to reorder the story – the prologue, for instance, happens between chapters four and five – and how to work the first-person perspective. Do I go for the typical Film Noiresque voiceover approach, or have Harry Salt talk directly to the camera, to the audience High Fidelity style?

That’s not all, though – with my friend Rene Engström having recently wrapped up her webcomic, Anders Loves Maria, I mentioned on Twitter that I’d been fighting the desire over the last few days to adapt the story into a screenplay. And Rene, Glod bless the poor misguided fool, has given me her blessing. Yikes! I’ve already started making notes! Iv’e got two adaptations on the go at once, not to mention two Jump Leads scripts on the go and a website redesign in the works!

Considering current events in my personal life, I welcome the distraction. I need it. It’s either work on stuff like this, or waste my day playing Star Trek Online, and that’s something I can easily do at night, when most of civilized society (well, most of American society at least) are asleep. If you play STO, come find me online – Paddon@Squirminator2k.

Anyway, sigh and lament. I’m off to bed. Far too late, as usual.

1. EXT. FLURRY – DAY

Tuesday, February 2nd, 2010

So after months of work, the script for Jump Leads #10: The Voyage Home is more or less finished. It probably still need a little polishing, but the first collaboration between all four of the Jump Leads writers has been finished. The first Jump Leads script to have more than one writer work on it. The first… oh, I can do this all day. The point is that this script is done, and I feel like a weight has been taken off of my shoulders. This is the absolute closest we’ve come to the wire. Usually the next two or three stories have already been written up by the time the issue you’re reading is on the website, but as I mentioned at the end of last year, I decided to throw out the next two years’ worth of scripts to take the story in a new direction.

With this script finished, and all the loose ends tied up together, I can’t wait to begin work on #11 (although considering we have a habit of slotting in four-page stories between the major ones, #10 may become #11, and #11 may become #13). It’s called Deus Ex Litterae. You know it’s going to be a good one because the title is in Latin.

I also had an idea for a film a couple of nights ago – for a romantic comedy, no less – but I’ll probably start work on that next week. I’ve not been very productive the last few days, as my wonderful girlfriend Helen is going to be flying back to Ohio on Saturday and will be staying there indefinitely. My current plan: Find a day job, earn enough to rent a place, and bring her home.

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