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Archive for January, 2010

An open letter to Whoever Winds Up Organising This Year’s “Rage Against The X-Factor” Campaign

Friday, January 29th, 2010

Dear loose confederacy of internet protestors,

You did good last year. You managed to bring to a stop The X-Factor’s streak of inane UK Christmas Number Ones. I applaud you for that. But next year could you… I don’t know… maybe pick a different song?

It’s not that I don’t appreciate your effort, and it’s not that I don’t like Rage Against The Machine (I don’t, but that’s besides the point), but it seems to me that you could use this as an opportunity to get an independent artist into the UK chart. Wouldn’t it be fantastic to discover that the Christmas #1 was Jonathan Coulton? Or Dan Bull? In fact “Thistopia” would make a perfect candidate for this year’s campaign. And it’s available to buy on iTunes. Perfect!

It also amuses me that you were given the opportunity to send an anti-X-Factor message a couple of years ago when Malcolm Middleton released “We’re All Going To Die”, but I guess The X-Factor wasn’t such as nuisance then. For some reason.

You’ve proven you have some kind of phenomenal cosmic power. That’s great. But maybe you could use it to send a message not just to The X-Factor but to the music industry as a whole. And the best way to do that is to throw your support behind an independent artist.

Think about it.

Kind regards,
Ben Paddon

Things I Would Do If I had $60 Right Now

Thursday, January 21st, 2010
  1. Preorder Star Trek Online: Digital Deluxe Edition from Steam.
  2. That’s pretty much it.

Some Thoughts Concerning Webcomics, Procrastination, and Getting Serious About Your Work

Saturday, January 16th, 2010

Last year I acknowledged I had a problem with procrastination, and this year I’ve started taking steps to overcome it. In the last two weeks I’ve worked on a Jump Leads script I’d been putting off doing for two months to the point where it’s very nearly finished, I’ve begun working with the rest of the Jump Leads creative team to screw down the details of an upcoming multiple-issue story arc as well as fleshing out a new character who we’ll be introducing at some point in the future, and I’ve redoubled my efforts to find a new dayjob. I’m also looking at ways of raising capital to properly publish the second book as well as to republish the first, having nearly sold out of my own stock, and trying to raise the profile of our little webcomic.

The Jump Leads stuff is particularly important because last year I realised that if I want to make a career out of writing, specifically out of writing Jump Leads, I need to be about 5,000% more focused than I have been. I need to stop looking at it as a hobby, as something for my portfolio while I wait for something bigger and better to come along and start looking after it properly.

It’s started to bother me when I see people in the webcomics community – that is, the lower end of the webcomics spectrum where you’ll find people such as myself – who in one breath say that they want to make a living out of webcomicry, and in another mention that they haven’tupdated their webcomic for the last three days running because they’ve been playing Modern Warfare 2. Or re-watching Firefly with the cast commentary. Or, y’know, they just haven’t gotten around to it yet.

How can you possibly be serious about making a living as a webcartoonist when you don’t even have the discipline or the inclination to get your comic drawn and updated? We’re talking about people who say they’re on, say, a thrice-weekly update schedule but who haven’t updated their comic in a week and a half, and then they wonder why their already small readership is dwindling.

It’s even worse when their Twitter feed is littered with tweets along the lines of, “Will draw next comic after this game of Assassin’s Creed II.” Then “Whoa, is that the time? I just got sucked into that game! I’ll draw the comic tomorrow.” Then “Gonna jump into Assassin’s Creed II again. Man, that game rocks.” Then ‘Why isn’t anyone reading my webcomic? :( :( :(

If you want your webcomic to succeed, the first rule is “Make it worth reading,” and the second rule is “Stick to your fucking update schedule.“*

And while I’m on the subject, let’s discuss the relaunched Webcomics.com, shall we?

To everyone who has pointed out the apparent “irony” of Halfpixel charging for access to the site now when in How To Make Webcomics they decry paywalls with a passion: You make a webcomic. You want people to read your stuff, and there are millions upon millions of webcomic readers out there. They, conversely, make a niche website. There are probably only thousands of fledgling webcartoonists out there, and probably only a hundred or so of those people who genuinely want to make a living from making webcomics.

To everyone who has balked at the cost: It’s $30 a year. That’s not a lot of money in the grand scheme of things – a drop in the hat compared to the cost of webhosting, convention table/booth costs, travel and accommodation expenses, book and tee-shirt printing, and so on. Brad’s articles – and they are mostly Brad’s articles – are worth every damned penny, and that the guy has been pouring so much effort into them for over a year for free is, frankly, criminal. Brad deserves some kind of compensation for such sterling work, and I for one don’t mind picking up part of the bill. If you’re serious about making a living as a webcartoonist, it’s completely and utterly worth it.

To everyone who takes offense to the above: If you feel you don’t need Webcomics.com, if you didn’t use it before or if you’ve never really had much interest in the articles, then that’s fair enough and I wish you luck. If you feel it’s something you want or need to have access to but you object to the idea of throwing a twenty and a ten in Guigar’s direction then you need to seriously reconsider whether you’re willing to put in the effort to making webcartooning your job, because if you aren’t prepared to pay $30 a year for articles that could potentially help you improve the way you go about your business (and what you’re doing is business if you’re taking it seriously) then will you be prepared to shell out for hosting? For marketing? For book-printing and all that other gubbins I mentioned earlier?

I utterly regret not taking full advantage of the website before they shifted it over to a pay model. I thumbed through it occasionally last year but I didn’t have the time – or, at least, I told myself I didn’t have the time – to read the articles in full. I’m kicking myself now. Absolutely kicking myself.

I’m going to go to sleep, and I’m going to enjoy my weekend. And Monday morning I’m going to wake up at 8am, have breakfast, and sit in front of my laptop at 9am ready to write, and plan, and prepare for the year ahead. What will you be doing?


* Yes, I’m aware that there’s a degree of irony in this statement considering Jump Leads’ schedule has been wobbly for the last four or five months. No, I’m not going to discuss it.

Wikipe-”annoyed grunt”-a

Friday, January 8th, 2010

There’s an episode of The Simpsons called “Mypods and Boomsticks”, famous for tackling the subject of Islam and terrorism, and attacking America’s perception of the religion. It also features rather blatant, shameless mocking of Apple, its userbase, and its line of products.

Typical, then, that Wikipedia’s editors (and by “Wikipedia’s editors” I mean the loose global collective of sticklers, pedants and, let’s be honest, complete fucking morons who take it upon themselves to update the encyclopedia) would include the following passage on their article about the episode:

MyPod“, “MyPhone“, “MyCube“, “Mapple Store“, “Braniac Bar“, and “Mapple” may be parodies of Apple Inc. and its products, though this is ambiguous.

“Ambiguous”? It’s blatant, init? Blatant! And in case you’re wondering, I didn’t add the links in that quote. They’re right there in the original article, linking to the articles relating to the Apple products the episodes parody.

Two sentences later in the very same article, it says this:

The CEO of Mapple is “Steve Mobbs”, a parody of Apple Inc. CEO Steve Jobs. The scene where Comic Book Guy throws a sledge hammer at the screen is a reference to the famous “1984″ Apple commercial.

Yes, well, of course.

A Quick Recap Of My Day

Wednesday, January 6th, 2010

I’ve had an interesting day so far. Here’s a recap for those of you not paying attention:

Helen: “Wake up, Ben!”

Me: “Alright, I’m awake.”

Agency: “Are you up?”

Me: “Yes.”

Agency: “Good. You’ve got a job. You start on Friday.”

Me: “Hooray!”

Agency: “Fill out this background check form.”

Me: “Definitely!”

Agency: “Oh, and the background check won’t be done by the time you’re supposed to start, so you don’t have the job after all.”

Me: “Bwa?”

Agency: “But I’ll put you forward for another, slightly higher-paying job, so fill out the forms anyway.”

Me: “Alright then.”

Agency Background Check Rep: “Thanks for the forms, we should get your background check finished today.”

Me: “Hang on, how come that’s not quick enough? Agency, what’s going on?”

Agency: “No idea. We’ll see what happens.”

Me: “Thanks.”

Agency: “Oh, the company have deleted the position.”

Me: “…”

This is the polar opposite of a bank error in my favour.

Here’s My Card

Tuesday, January 5th, 2010

On Monday I took every Christmas and Yule card I was given and put them in the recycling bin. I do this every year, and I can’t help but feel like it’s a waste. I don’t mean to come across as a Scrooge, but I’ve always felt like Christmas and birthday cards were something of a waste. I appreciate the sentiment, certainly, but the card just goes in the trash after the fact and the money people spend on a card could easily have been put to better use.

My birthday is April 26th. Instead of getting me a card, I’d like to ask that my friends and family instead make a donation to my charity of choice, Child’s Play. Those children’s hospitals could use the money much more than I could use a square bit of card.

As Someone Who’s Looked At a Thing, You Might Like This Other, Vaguely Relevant Thing

Monday, January 4th, 2010

Amazon just sent me an email. This isn’t unusual – they send me about a dozen of the buggers a day – but this one is a little bit… well, odd.

There are two problems with this email. The first one, a minor one, is that we didn’t buy our PS3 remote from Amazon. We bought it from a brick-and-mortar Best Buy store the same day we bought our console. I’ve never bought a remote control from Amazon.

This is dwarfed by a slightly larger question. That being: How in the Hell does a Bluray remote control have any relevance to the game being marketed, besides the fact that they’re both for the PlayStation 3? It makes no ruddy sense at all. It’s like saying, “We see you’ve bought socks from us in the past. Would you like a pedicure?” Yes, they’re both foot-related, but they’re very different things.

And I’d love a pedicure, although I was sadly born without toenails.

Dan Bull

Monday, January 4th, 2010

Are you familiar with Dan Bull? He’s a British hip-hop artist who is absolutely fantastic. I could sit here gushing about his work, but instead I’ll let a track from his album, “Safe”, do the talking:

Bull’s first album is available to buy now, but he’s also put the entire thing up to download for free. Really, you’ve no excuse not to check out this guy’s incredible work.

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